Plan the perfect playdate for your kids

Keen to organise a playdate for your child? Follow our tips (created by parents and therapists) to get started!

These days, planning a playdate can often be like putting a jigsaw puzzle together. It involves a lot of patience to wait for the parts to come together. From scheduling, preparing allergy friendly food and finding the right place to hold activities, planning playdates is no easy task. Don’t know where to start? Don’t stress! At Novita, our therapists work closely with families to support meaningful and successful social interactions for kids of all ages. We understand the challenges parents face when organising playdates—and we’re here to help! In this article, we have compiled the top tips for planning a playdate compiled by our Novita therapists and parents.

Socialising and playing with friends is an important aspect of having a healthy and positive childhood. By regularly spending time with others, kids will learn important communication and social skills, and it can also help to build their confidence.

For many kids, attending play dates and meeting new people can also reduce loneliness and bring a sense of belonging, while also engaging in fun, and age-appropriate activities. Play dates can also create an inclusive setting where kids can meet different people from a variety of cultural and social backgrounds.

From building important skills in relationships, to building confidence and staying active, playdates provide many benefits for kids’ healthy development. Read more below:

• Development of important social skills – playdates encourage positive communication and interaction. They also provide opportunities to practice turn-taking, sharing, and working together.
• Boosting confidence – playing with friends can support kids to feel included and valued in a social setting while also supporting positive self-esteem through positive interactions.
• Encouraging friendships – organising playdates for your kids can help them to develop friendships and meaningful relationships with others. This can reduce loneliness and give them a sense of belonging.
• Promoting inclusion and understanding – playdates can encourage kids to understand and embrace different people. They can also break down stereotypes and promote acceptance.
• Learning important skills through play – playdates are an enjoyable way to develop motor, cognitive, and social skills, especially if there are games involved. They can also encourage creativity and problem-solving in group settings.
• Building a support network – Regularly organising playdates can provide opportunities for parents to connect, share experiences and advice.
• Emotional development – playdates can support kids to learn how to deal with their and other people’s feelings
• Staying active – Attending playdates promotes being healthy (especially if they are outside)
• Creating a sense of belonging – attending playdates supports kids to feel a sense of inclusion and community.

We understand that parents might feel nervous about organising playdates, as there is a lot to consider! Our Novita parents have put together a list of challenges and solutions that people may face when trying to organise playdates (scroll down if you want to get straight to our top tips.)

• Rejection – when people say no, it can often come across as a reflection on us, rather than schedules or timing not working, for example. The fear of rejection is one of the main concerns our Novita parents had when organising playdates.
• Timing – finding the right time when everyone is available can be overwhelming due to different schedules and commitments.
• Ability to get along – some parents said they worry about their kids’ ability to get along with others and whether putting them in a new environment might cause stress.
• Unpredictability — unpredictability may be a factor in parents being anxious about organising playdates (e.g., parking, where to go, toilet access, food and drink options, sensory considerations, fencing and other safety requirements.)

Our Novita parents and therapists advise that dealing with these issues can be difficult, but it’s more important to work through them so that kids can still participate in playdates. Many of them state the positives outweigh the negatives, so it’s important to continue in making efforts to organising playdates.

Here are some quick solutions to use for each concern:

• Rejection – remembering that people often say ‘no’ because of timing rather than not wanting to spend time with someone.
• Timing – we recommend asking other parents far in the future so that they have plenty of time to check their schedules in advance.
• Ability to get along – if you are worried about your child’s ability to get along with others, a good step would be to go through some exercises and coping strategies well ahead of the playdate – our therapy team can support you with this.
• Unpredictability – find something that is comfortable for everyone so that there are no unexpected issues throughout the playdate

Find out if your child is interested in connecting with a new person. This could be done through asking a question like ‘would you like to see them outside of school?’  

Then you should speak to the parent/carer of this new friend to find a time and a place that would suit the playdate. Remember to exchange contact information so you can get in touch. 

After this, you should decide on somewhere for the playdate. Some ‘kid-friendly’ places include local cafés, libraries or public parks.  

Before the playdate, parents should be encouraging, and talk about how others might play, think, or communicate. Teaching kids some Key Word Signs such as ‘hello’, ‘how are you’, ‘yes’ and ‘no’ to help communicate with those who are non-speaking is also a great recommendation.

When organising a playdate, parents should be flexible and understanding. This means making scheduling as convenient as possible for all involved. This could be done by using Google Calendar or Outlook. Our therapists recommend that a calm, easy-going environment creates a relaxed and welcoming atmosphere for both parents and kids.

Our team also states that families should be open about their needs and preferences when initiating the idea of a playdate. If you’d prefer to meet at a park because it’s more comfortable, then communicate that openly and ask if this arrangement works for the other family as well.

Parents should also take the time to learn about the other family’s preferred activities or locations. Doing this can identify shared interests, making it easier to plan a playdate that everyone can enjoy.

Another suggestion is to start with a casual invitation to the other parent or caregiver. You could catch up over coffee and leave the option open for them to bring their child along or not. An informal meet-up is a great way to make a connection, discuss your childrens’ needs, and build trust before initiating a playdate.

For first time playdates, our therapists advise to meet up somewhere like a playground where there is lots of room to play, rest and take a break if they need to. Parents should also provide healthy and allergy friendly snacks throughout the playdate.

After you’ve organised your first playdate and establish what kids enjoy doing, we encourage parents to plan activities that are engaging, fun and keep kids away from the screen. Some ideas include:

• Obstacle Course – Use playground equipment to create a challenge (e.g. climb the ladder, go down the slide, jump three times, and swing for five seconds!)
• Freeze Tag – One child is ‘It’ and must tag others. When tagged, they freeze until another player unfreezes them.
• Follow the Leader – One child leads while the others mimic their actions (e.g. like jumping, sliding, or crawling through tunnels.)
• Treasure Hunt – Hide small toys or objects around the playground and let kids search for them.
• The Floor Is Lava – Players must avoid touching the ground, using playground equipment to move around safely.
• Monkey Bar Challenge – See who can cross the monkey bars the fastest or hang the longest.
• Shadow Tag – Instead of tagging bodies, kids try to step on each other’s shadows to tag them.

If you all have a zoo pass, Adelaide Zoo could also be a great location for a play date. There is a communication board at the zoo for Augmentative and Alternative Communication users.

A play café is also a good option, and our team says to call ahead to ask if the venue has a quiet/sensory period and booking during those times.

Libraries also offer regular playgroups during the school holidays which are often disability friendly and set in a sensory friendly environment.

Below is a full list tested and trialed by our parents and therapists:

• Inclusive Playgrounds in Adelaide 
• Best Playgrounds in Adelaide 
• Inclusive play in Adelaide
• Accessibility at Adelaide Zoo 
• Library play groups 

Rejection can be difficult to deal with under any circumstance. If someone says ‘no’ to your playdate invitation, try to keep in mind that it isn’t personal. They could be busy with other commitments including work, health or family. We suggest that parents offer multiple date alternatives for a playdate, so people have more times and dates to choose from.

Quick tip: Our parents and therapists say that many families may have the same anxieties regarding playdates, so don’t let it stop you from pursuing fun and engaging interactions with new people!

Parents can support their children to have fun playdates by actively teaching and modeling social skills through play at home. These include demonstrating positive interactions, such as taking turns, sharing toys, coping with winning and losing, and how to work together in teams.

For playdates held at home, it’s helpful to prepare by discussing what toys and games kids feel comfortable sharing with others, resolving any potential conflict. Our therapists and parents also state that children should be encouraged to look forward to playdates through highlighting the positives. These include the fun they’ll have and the opportunity to build friendships which can also foster enthusiasm and confidence. Additionally, preparing children ahead of time by discussing who is coming over, their specific needs, and any communication or accessibility requirements helps set expectations and promote understanding.

Novita staff actively encourage parents to organise regular playdates and social activities for their kids. Our therapists support parents in organising playdates, answering any questions and understanding concerns. We suggest speaking to your child’s therapy team if you need support organising playdates or need ideas for building positive and meaningful friendships for your kid.